I was here

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Searching

I am wandering down the halls of my mind… There are doors I keep wanting to open. The ghosts of experiences that are crying for my attention. I recall them, then I slam them shut. I would rather run, than face them, even one. I built the walls, strong. Never once letting them falter, never once letting them down.

 The people.

The places.

The thoughts.

The spaces.

*

They made me… yet I made myself…

They shaped me… yet I overcame myself

Through loss and gain, my thoughts made me sane.

I played the game… and ever did I change.

First and above all Dad.

L and J, was it me or was it them?

The ground where it burned

The home which was always cold.

I didn’t belong.

I still don’t.

Yet now I’m home, and the ghosts are crying for my attention.

*

I listen as I write, waiting for what I am trying to say. Yet the thoughts remain the same.

I know what I overcame, yet that which made me  is slowly driving me insane…

*

I know the answer, yet I don’t want to hear…

It is in there, trying to form itself clear…

Is it me?

Please answer my fears…

it is, but its ok

Boundaries

In the beginning I sink
,

Slow…

yet as fast as sound and the mind.

Deep down into an abyss,

Hidden…

Buried with time.

A feeling…

Thoughts form before my wandering eyes.

Yet they are closed. They know…


Incomplete…

Moments elude …

They grace what knowledge knows.

As if pieces are missing from my soul

Taken…

Hidden…

in plain sight

*

Panicking I feel holes in my heart.

Throbbing and alive.

My soul.

I know.

I must go to fill these holes.

Dull the subtle pain

Yet this moment finds me insane

*

All I ever needed


I misplaced along the way

As I backtrack

I miss the path

Further and further I go


I can not find my heart

I can not find my soul

I scream

My screams are muted

Muted by a place that is beyond sound

Movement in the distance I see


I run

My legs moving as fast as permitted

So fast

In this place there are no rules

I can fly

*

In the distance I see over the hills

Pieces of my soul are there

The holes from my heart

But the darkness produces shadows

I want to see clear figures in the opaque sky

I want to dance with the shadows of the moon

I want to put in words what I see


Simultaneous and Impossible

I need to complete my soul

I need to finish this dream

*

Every moment of this place collapses

My dream retracts

Back and forward

It is understood

somewhere

just not here

In a world where there are no boundaries


In a moment that spans a lifetime


I understand

My dream culminates with a realization

Not taken

Simply Free

In this place with no boundaries

*

Just in time for the journey back to my slumbering body


My soul weary

Yet happy

Solace found for my mind

With my souls completion

My heart and soul alight

With Love

With Knowledge

But was it real?

As I dreamed it?

Or perhaps I was the dream

Of chaos

In this place with no boundaries

it reaches me

*

sometimes I wonder what it is I really am thinking.

sometimes I wonder what it is I really am feeling.

sometimes it just makes no sense. it makes me tired.

~enreal

 

Time speaks

What say the time… when love becomes divine

When the spirit breaks… leaving behind the wake

The ripples upon water

The shallow darkness falters

`

What say the time… when knowledge leaves the mind

When the body trembles… chasing the passages of death

The passages of birth

The breeze escapes the deepest depth

The echos carried upon the softest of breath

`

What say the time… when the heart slows the spirit

When the soul loosens… the hold is free

It aches in remembering… it beats for life

It awakens… it forgets

`

What say the time… upon the sacred hour

When the mind and body see

When love and knowledge are mirrored

When the Heart and soul are free

The veil is lifted

The mirror reflects

The knowing that has been there

The knowledge held with care

The mind, the heart, the spirit, the soul… all hold pieces… perhaps they shall see

Upon the sacred hour

Forever shall they be free

For now Time is silent

Listen to be heard

A reason

Fear not the night, nor the darkness which heralds false unease. The prospect of our senses blinded by the lack of light… the lack of sun… the lack of awareness as to what we shall become. Freedom awakens to the heavens as we drift to where our souls meet… ready for the mind to release and the soul to take flight… the wind remains calm, for the rays dance in ethereal light…

On the wings of my soul

In the shadows of my plight
On the borders of my mind
As my spirit brings forth sight

As vivid as our dreams
As immortal as our souls
As our endless years unfold
The truth we always hold

On the cusp of a dawn
Our sorrows were reborn
Shadows of the eclipsed sun
Casting hope

Though they sought none

Now the shadow’s seeking night

Night as darkness

Dawn as sorrow

Be it as a light in the morrow

Be it happiness in the perceived abyss

Be it simply

Life is not always as it is

So I say, once more… fear not that which can be misunderstood. Fear not darkness simply because it is dark. Dismiss not pain simply because it hurts. Deny not sorrow for the well may once be full… there is always season… there is always a reason

And reason is as Life

Air of being

Do you believe
In what seems to be

The love felt for your souls
The pain felt for yours lost

How tomorrow can come after today
How a day can span forever
A moment may exist ever or never

Do you believe

In what seems to be

Your souls completion left aside
Your souls reason passed on by

Your souls adrift
You lost your mind
Your place is missed

Perhaps left behind

 

Do you believe

In what seems to be

 

To lose a piece of your soul
Time often takes its toll
Its seems unfair that all must wait
For the time we contemplate

If we were born too late

If we have missed the date
Why do we have to wait
For our destined fate

To reveal the truth

To our soul

To see the meaning

In our mind

To believe in what seems to be

For ever

Or perhaps

just this time

 

 

 

 

 

 

~wordsweneversaidthank you

The Veil

Come in through the veil
Through the curtain of despair
Open the window to the world
Breathe the beauty in the air

Stop hiding behind a mirror
Show yourself to me
Cowardice does not suffice
You are me and I am Life

I confront thee
For you shadow me
I oppose thee
For you are less than me

Of whom do I speak?
Of the one whom makes us weak
Filling our minds with fallacy
Diluting our hopes and fantasies

The Villain
Is here
Hiding behind
Waiting for the moment
Until you find…

He is you
And you are me
Lest for you and I
Can open our minds
See our hopes
And remember our dreams

Hiding is our soul

Our mind was left to know

That only now does it show
That only now will it grow
For we killed the doubt
Lifted the veil and broke it out

Freed the soul
Left our spirit whole
The veil is lifted
We are gifted

Gift is knowledge
Knowledge is power
Power is free
Freedom is key…