what was it that I set out to discover? was it the mystery? Perhaps a meaning. Perhaps it was simply a reason, a reason for now.

I remember awaking to the sound of my heart, or perhaps it was my mind… I don’t truly know. I remember the hollow feeling after a night of adventurous visions. I remember it was as if I didn’t belong to my body, only to my mind. I remember because I choose to. I hold onto that memory because it reminds me of all the times I chose  to forget.

During the countless times I daydream, the infinite mindscape in my head as it wanders and envisions dreams and hopes… as it traverses fears and realities into the infinite and magnificent possibilities of the universes. I chose not to forget for these and many reasons.

It makes me sick sometimes. To know how separated I have become while all the while yearning. It is the want and need which is starving me. The mirage in the desert which never quenches…

But alas, I digress. This began as a question…

what was it that I set out to discover?


did I discover it?


did I capture it?

No. But I defined it, therefore it exists… and That… is enough for now.


As I walk in the cold night the snow gently passes my sight. It falls. I breathe in. Exhale out. The visibility of my air carries my gaze just past the darkness. I watch it disappear with all illusion.


I follow my step easily. I catch my thoughts dancing. There. A hint of magic. The stars visible as the snow. Dark and moonless is the night. There a hint of remembrance.


The wind whispers its cold voice. Cold and ignored. Ignored and misunderstood.



It whispers…


It calls…

Here is the magic I yearn for. yet palpable it is not. I wish to hold it in my hand. I wish to smell its sweet reality. Taste its magnificence. This is not it.

Oh but it is… you can not hold it… you can not smell nor taste it… but you can feel it

With that it ended. Within that moment of awareness. The moment the vapor mingled with the darkness of the night. That… and the blink of an eye. Reality changes into illusion once again.


Sweet darkness hold your magic close. For I shall return for it on another glimpse. I can feel it. ~enreal