Broken things remembered

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What would you have me do

Sit here simply and dream of you

While my days decay and wander

While my nights betray as I ponder,

your fate.

.

Life is changing

I need you here

Time is fading the memory I once had so clear

and I fear

I may never have you near

again

.

it has been a long while

since I felt or seen your smile

it has been so many years

as I have cried and hidden tears

and now I hear

Time’s toll the bells of years

.

how can I call the future what it is

it holds many possibilities

all of which are dreams

and things

which are broken…

.

Or are they?

Perhaps my mind

or

my vision

is fractured

For Now

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The end of forever

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So Alive

eternal

and beautiful

as we move

together

in the night

this night

forever

.

Inanimate

transient

still beautiful

still together

in the day

this day

forever

.

arms raised

warmth

as she shines

first towards

then inside

me

forever

.

yet tell me now, this forever… when will it begin?

will it remain after our final breath?

will it transcend the logic of our presence?

tell me now, what is this it… and can she even be stopped?

Can she see and breath in the answer?
Or is she the answer?

This forever began when it ended within her mind…

.

Let it end I say,

for these dreams of eternity

Are simply dreams.

When we wake we find

life is finite.

and  she holds it

as she holds everything

.

What is it?

Who is she?
Or should I say He?

The ending of forever

.

the sound of dreams

Lucid-Dream-1

There was a time when I remembered.

Paid conscious thought to the mind and eagerly waited for my dreams at night.

The nights dawned with the most lucid of dreams.

The vivid colors and brilliant possibilities.

Freedom.

Awareness.

Fearless.

Divine.

Now the time is passed and I wait for the nights in hope and anticipation for a glimpse of the possibility to live.

Even for  a moment, as I have done for eternity.

All that I dreamed and thought of myself has faded with the image I held of my world.

My dreamscape

My escape

My one chance to be safe…

I chose and I faltered for the reality of my truths

What have I now but truths.

I forsake them

I don’t want them

Why then must I have them…

Leave me be

Alone with the sounds of my dreams

Loss

Image

I

What would you have me do

Sit here simply and dream of you

While my dreams lay broken on the floor

Never to fly

Never to soar

II

What would you have me do

Get on my knees and beg of you

To unveil your eyes and hear my tears

They are only tears

They fall

III

What would you have me do

As I know I have all of you

Despite my mind

I know my  heart

If ever should part

It would be  a start to loss

Dreams of Love

Dream/ 1: a series of thoughts, images or emotions occurring during sleep 2: a dreamlike vision 3: something noted for its beauty, excellence, or enjoyable quality 4: ideal
Dream/ 1: to have a dream of 2: to indulge in daydreams or fantasies 3: imagine

During night or day, during sleep or relaxation, we drift… sometimes we see another world where our lives are different…sometimes we see our lives perfect…or simply we dream. We dream of ideal circumstances… believing in all, and all believing in us as if everything we believe doesn’t exist at all.
They say we need our dreams, that short time when we slip into unconsciousness, we need that time to take hold of our emotions and funnel them into the belief that there is something else that exists.

The truth of the matter is we dream, we visualize and conceptualize life, circumstances upon circumstances which in most cases makes little to no sense at all. Yet, we are told to, “read into our dreams”, “interpret and analyze” the hell out of them, until we see an elephant as an admission of guilt for hating our mothers, or something as ridiculous as that. Dreams are an escape, or a gateway to that life which we seek. Dreams enable us to be that hero we naturally are not, to fly which naturally we can not do, or to be as we would never be. I live for my dreams; they are my gateway to heaven.

I dreamed a dream so full of passion…unconventional passion for life, and love… it made me want to die for I fear shall never feel that ever again… or worse, forget the reality of it…

Passion/ 2: strong feeling; also Pl: the emotions are distinguished from reason 3: RAGE, ANGER 4: LOVE; also; an object of affection or enthusiasm 5: sexual desire- passionate.

What other word could hold such a large variety of meaning? One definition would capture the huge scope of human plight and want all at once. Passion is what we seek for fulfillment in life, whether it is passion for what we do and create or passion for what we are and who we love.

This dream is simple, to feel passion for love, passion for life. To want to know of love as in the stories. To want to be the damsel in distress saved by some prince charming, simply because we all need love. We all need to feel. We are given such a short time, before the sun sets on our horizon we need to reach for more, forget about loss and capture what there is to gain. There is always love. To believe in love…

Love

Love 1: strong affection 2: warm attachment 3: an attraction based on sexual desire 4: a beloved person
Love 1: CHERISH 2: to feel passion, devotion, or tenderness for 3: CARESS 4: to take pleasure in

The types of love we seek daily, love from…parents, spouses, lovers, colleagues, friends, co-workers, and even strangers.

We seek love everyday, we need to be felt for the way we feel for others. Even the most cold hearted will feel love for something, crudely put, an example being money if nothing else.

Sometimes you need to see the truth in order to move forward. This is simple. I believed that there was no love out there, only what you read about or saw in the movies. In the past it seemed that there was a possibility for love, chivalry and romance. In today’s society there is only desire for sex and emptiness in romance. If love songs and movies are for the dreamers and do not exist out of the scope of these fictional things, then answer why we listen, or why we watch, or why everyday we hope?

This arose from a dream… A dream of love lost… a dream of love found… a dream of no love at all… but alas it was just a dream… and like all dreams, you eventually wake…

Let us venture into dreams once again… it is safe… if only for another infinite journey through love lost

Magic

what was it that I set out to discover? was it the mystery? Perhaps a meaning. Perhaps it was simply a reason, a reason for now.

I remember awaking to the sound of my heart, or perhaps it was my mind… I don’t truly know. I remember the hollow feeling after a night of adventurous visions. I remember it was as if I didn’t belong to my body, only to my mind. I remember because I choose to. I hold onto that memory because it reminds me of all the times I chose  to forget.

During the countless times I daydream, the infinite mindscape in my head as it wanders and envisions dreams and hopes… as it traverses fears and realities into the infinite and magnificent possibilities of the universes. I chose not to forget for these and many reasons.

It makes me sick sometimes. To know how separated I have become while all the while yearning. It is the want and need which is starving me. The mirage in the desert which never quenches…

But alas, I digress. This began as a question…

what was it that I set out to discover?

Magic.

did I discover it?

Yes. 

did I capture it?

No. But I defined it, therefore it exists… and That… is enough for now.