Category Archives: Conversations

Yesterday’s Tomorrow

Posted by enreal on

fork-in-the-road_300

Walking towards tomorrow,

Slowly coming to a pause

Staring at the face of a stranger

One who remembers,

One who is lost…

“Leave behind the facade,” She whispers

“Forget today the meaning of why, remember who you are, wake the Soul inside…”

 

Walking away from yesterday

Taking moments time to reflect

A glimpse of an old face, a distant place

One which has yet to rest.

“A minute seems like years,” He states

“Moments in eternities, time is an uncertainty…”

“Remember my friend, and take this to your stage… remember my life, for meaning is worth little when the play has yet to arise…”

 

Standing in this moment,

Before the fork of time.

One path brings tomorrow,

One can bring back time…

 

For now I shall wait at yesterday’s tomorrow

For now I shall stay,

In Now…

Mush

Posted by enreal on

What do I want to write about?  This seems to be the issue of the moment. I have been sitting here working on five different essays… all revolving around a similar point. A point which I fail to see…Intelligence, Judgement, Worth, Purpose and Meaning. While all the issues are large and complex… I find myself going back and forth between them.  One thought comes to mind, then lapses… finding it seemingly hard to make a point for argument, a point of reason or any point at all… Mush…

I sit here, coffee in hand,  listening to the rythm of the background music (aka elevator music), watching the locals enter the coffee shop, I drift… to and fro in the mush… my words, people, seemingly unrelated movements, seemingly unconnected realities… what makes these thoughts evolve… what makes this essay take shape?

Couples young and old lazily conversing… The father out for an early dinner with his daughter, individuals wrapped in thought, the employees seemingly busy behind the counter are as detached from their work as I am from mine… 

Then there are the technologies practically attatched to the bodies of so many… distractions.  Some sit and do as I do, write (or try to)… some listen to their music, some sit and watch their computers… some sit and read… some simply eat and stare off into their universe. Interesting to see so many different realities… so many connections made with little or no awareness of myself. I sit and write about my surroundings, about all the strangers I do not know… and yet I do know them in my world… I imagine their lives from their actions, from their behaviors and from my thoughts, my imagination…  observing is what makes these situations real in my world. For how else can I experience it without imagining it…  seemingly unrelated movements, seemingly unconnected realities… are connected for my mind. Here in my universe all the randomness makes sense, all the chaos is explained to my curious mind…

Mush…

I wonder what point I am trying to make… perhaps sometimes there is no point at all… perhaps sometimes  we must simply observe and imagine… perhaps the unrelated and unconnected are not and we simply fail to see

Or perhaps it is just mush…

You know

Posted by enreal on

You know where it is 

The window to your mind

The gateway to your soul

 

You know where to find

The passage to your heart

A peace to make you whole 

 

You know where to heal

Within the fibers of your body

In the depths of your being

 

You know of the pain

You know of the sorrow

You know the emptiness

Perhaps shall be filled tomorrow

 

Somewhere within you know

One day it will show

All in turn will be

The answers you know

And wish them to be

 

It is here

The answer you know

It has always been here

It is now beginning to show

Shining ever so brightly

Out of your soul

 

Be well and grow

Posted by enreal on

 

How truly do we know ourselves?
It is true we must look closely.
We must analyze ourselves

We must let go of the past.
People seem too quick to judge others
Too slow to look upon themselves

Stop thinking of what others think.
What you believe
Is what you will be

Happiness can only come
From the truest part of your soul
Try to fool yourself
Achieve nothing

Question the negativity
Let it go
Doubt the negativity
It will go

Beliefs block communication
Beliefs influence your mind
Your mind is the translator to the soul

Be one
Be whole
Be well
Know…
Then you shall grow

Evolution of thought and conversation

Posted by enreal on

The perfect conversation… it sometimes begins with a moment of silence. A glance, or perhaps a daydream interrupted by reality… you are there, and the thought shyly enters the precipice of the mind… ready to take the plunge.

“Will I make an impact?” the thought softly thinks to itself…

“perhaps, lets give it a try”… 

The journey begins… “I wonder…” the thought formulates into reason.

“If you could travel to the end of the universe to learn one truth… to gain the meaning and reason behind one question… what would it be?”

The thought is satisfied… its part is finished in this journey… the rest is up to the mind. The evolution of the thought… the path it must journey to please the mind… 

 

They all sit, now fully aware that the journey is about to begin. The journey will be long and reach far beyond expectation… it always does… The time and energy spent will be rewarded with a smile, an understanding, a knowledge… the butterflies of the mind.

“Is there an Edward out there for me?”, the group understands… She speaks of Love… holding a connection with another so pure and beautiful it can only be defined by an intangible thought. Soul Mates… what a beautiful thought… to dream the potential of love… to feel the necessity and to hold hope… but what of Love… a love so pure it transcends… this question traveled to the ends of the universe to reach her mind… this question evolved into a discussion on Love, Hate, Need, Want… it evolved into a discussion on family and friends, reason and purpose… tis seemingly small thought touched the heart and mind softly, elegantly… 

 

“What makes it my time to go?” To speak of death… to find meaning in life… to learn to accept… or to fight to hold on… The group weighs the heaviness of this thought… the answers so quick to come, slow… We speak of lessons and explore our wants. We discuss achievement, losses, the trails we all face, our truths… do you believe we will know? Perhaps God knows…

 

“What is it all worth?” All sit, perplexed… a bit smug… how often have we thought this before… yet the answers flowed purely, with no sarcasm, spoken simply with true meaning… “the bottom line”, “moments”, or perhaps the moment of pure insight, “You won’t know until it happens”. Brilliant!

 

“Why do we learn more from pain? Pain becomes a scar, yet happiness is a memory.” A discussion turns into one of individual trials and triumphs. Evolves into the beauty of the thought… the truth in it… Learning, processing, taking all there is to take… This was deep.

 

“Why must we face fears, my greatest fear is…”  As the group descends down this painful path we all come to face with a fear… “loss of parent”, “not receiving love” “not living life” “coming up short, not living up to my potential” “relearning mistakes”… we all share and contemplate… There is a moment when we are unburdened by our fears… perhaps it came when we faced and looked into the darkest place of our souls… for we try so desperately to hide our fears… “perplexing, when we all must live with them… they affect no other than self… Why do we hide?”

 

I had my first meeting last thursday… as you can tell it went exceptionally well… I gained so much energy and knowledge it was amazing… Tomorrow I will be holding the second “perfect conversation club” meeting. I have already begun my journey with this,  it is hopefully going to be in my life for sometime. I share with you these questions and answers in hope that you share some of your own, both questions and answers. Look forward to a chat… Thanks for taking this journey with me!

To Know Love

Posted by enreal on

Have you ever needed something so badly your body rejects everything else… Your mind accepts no comfort… it almost feels as if your hear has been torn from your chest… Can you imagine this feeling? The hole… stretching from your lungs to the pit of your stomach… Empty. Hollow… Can you imagine the feeling? To believe it will never be healed.

Only when your mind accepts the pain. It will be dulled. 

Only when your body realizes the heart is missing will the hole be filled with blood and fire… A low burning never to be quenched by any thought or act… 

Only when the soul looks to find the heart… in desperate search will the mind and body begin to relive the pain… to feel again… to work together again…

Now answer me this… Imagine this hole… this loss… the void of something which has never been witnessed… only remembered… remembered by not the body, nor the mind… remembered only by the soul… the past forgotten… the past in a dream…

 

The veiled memory… the memory of a mirage… a memory which you never owned, never touched… yet it is there… beneath the surface. Within your reflection. Behind your hard facade. It is and always will be there.  The memory… Lost love… this is how you know… you can love…

New Year Dreams…

Posted by enreal on

As many of you know I am always searching for the perfect conversation… it is the inspiration behind one of my dream books… I have been working on  4 different books… I dream of being published and have been working on becoming a published author (not very hard, but I am writing… I suppose that is the important part). It has always been a dream of mine… but alas, reality dictates I must work and earn a living for myself. How I would love to be at home and be able to write and read and learn my life away…

 

This year  I am trying to make one of my dreams a reality… I have journals and manuscripts and am self editing daily… keeping up with this world and my imaginary one is taxing, but I can not complain… I love to be here and in my mind… I prefer to be in my dreams, but we all know how real reality is… 

 

So back to my perfect conversations… I have had many… many have been written here on these journal pages… all of my friends from this medium have enriched my life beyond words… the insights shared here have outshone my work in many ways…and at many times. Thank you. 

 

This all came from my sisters recent visit… she was visiting from Florida. Her and I have perfect conversations at ease… we discuss life and purpose… happiness and meaning… we reach deep into sense and try to answer our minds… always when she leaves I feel disheartened. It is difficult to have a conversation with someone… let alone what I search for… the perfect conversation has to have that spark… that deep desire for knowledge… it should leave you with butterflies in your mind, like you have touched upon some wisdom, some deep knowledge… 

So I came up with an idea… it happened today at work… I was pondering a recent addition to my works and asked a friend for her thoughts… I began on my conversation hoping for some input , some spark… and it came… why not create the perfect conversation… make it a reality… create the setting, ambiance, and have a discussion… choose a topic and let it flow… it is research and it begins on Thursday!!! I invited some friends over and hope the magic will follow… I know it will… They have been informed that this is research… they have been informed that I need input … they have been willingly dragged into my scheme…  🙂

 

So now I drag you 🙂 I have made a list of topics to tackle… truth be told all I want is for them to think… to dive into their minds… let them give some input on their beliefs… on their thoughts… what makes them happy, sad… what would they ask if they had just one question… those kind of things. Should make for some fun… how often are we asked? So for anyone who is interested… what would you like to talk about… The Perfect Conversation Club

Discussions will follow…


I am excited… thank you for bearing with me over the past few weeks… it has been dark, but now I see the lights… it has come from all over… it has come from your hearts… I love all of you… Peace!