chasing dreams

“Too much reading has me chasing dreams,” She sighed as she realized this was her story.

This was her truth. She would read and imagine and live and breathe in the words, breathe in the worlds. Since she could remember she believed she was special, different even. She accepted and reveled in her secrets. She would smile when daydreaming, imagining the different fantasies unfolding in her mind. She would envision perfect situations and conversations, so often that on somedays she would blend reality and her mind.

She waited for her dreams, yet years came in their stead. She waited for her dreams to live, for she always believed they were magic, her magic. She waited but as the years came and went they left her the gift of doubt. Doubt to her was not feared, it simply saddened her. And that’s when she found her truth, that’s when she realized as she read the words,

“it’s alright”


Inspired by George R.R. Martin “A Dance with Dragons”


“Do you like to read books …”

“A reader lives a thousand lives before he dies, the man who never reads lives only one”

I have escaped into my words for years. I have lived, loved, laughed, cried, and even died. I have seen so many worlds that if this is all that my life has to give me, it truly would be alright. I am blessed with my dreams, though they haunt me I know that they are my gift. And for now they remain on the pages of books.

New Year Dreams…

As many of you know I am always searching for the perfect conversation… it is the inspiration behind one of my dream books… I have been working on  4 different books… I dream of being published and have been working on becoming a published author (not very hard, but I am writing… I suppose that is the important part). It has always been a dream of mine… but alas, reality dictates I must work and earn a living for myself. How I would love to be at home and be able to write and read and learn my life away…


This year  I am trying to make one of my dreams a reality… I have journals and manuscripts and am self editing daily… keeping up with this world and my imaginary one is taxing, but I can not complain… I love to be here and in my mind… I prefer to be in my dreams, but we all know how real reality is… 


So back to my perfect conversations… I have had many… many have been written here on these journal pages… all of my friends from this medium have enriched my life beyond words… the insights shared here have outshone my work in many ways…and at many times. Thank you. 


This all came from my sisters recent visit… she was visiting from Florida. Her and I have perfect conversations at ease… we discuss life and purpose… happiness and meaning… we reach deep into sense and try to answer our minds… always when she leaves I feel disheartened. It is difficult to have a conversation with someone… let alone what I search for… the perfect conversation has to have that spark… that deep desire for knowledge… it should leave you with butterflies in your mind, like you have touched upon some wisdom, some deep knowledge… 

So I came up with an idea… it happened today at work… I was pondering a recent addition to my works and asked a friend for her thoughts… I began on my conversation hoping for some input , some spark… and it came… why not create the perfect conversation… make it a reality… create the setting, ambiance, and have a discussion… choose a topic and let it flow… it is research and it begins on Thursday!!! I invited some friends over and hope the magic will follow… I know it will… They have been informed that this is research… they have been informed that I need input … they have been willingly dragged into my scheme…  🙂


So now I drag you 🙂 I have made a list of topics to tackle… truth be told all I want is for them to think… to dive into their minds… let them give some input on their beliefs… on their thoughts… what makes them happy, sad… what would they ask if they had just one question… those kind of things. Should make for some fun… how often are we asked? So for anyone who is interested… what would you like to talk about… The Perfect Conversation Club

Discussions will follow…

I am excited… thank you for bearing with me over the past few weeks… it has been dark, but now I see the lights… it has come from all over… it has come from your hearts… I love all of you… Peace!

Your Book

Reach for the future
Throw back the past

Reach for happiness
Follow subconsciousness

Where are we when
all we understand is here?
What have we when
all we comprehend has gone?

We reach out for human hope
We attempt to track what is not
We reach out for human faith
We try to read a book that has no page

Life is written before us
Each day a new chapter
The climax and plot are twisted into one
Daily ties produce new reasons

Reasons are not meant to be understood
One day they will be clear
One day that has no time or year
On that one fine day we will see
What we were meant and have come to be

Write your book
The book does not write your life

Ethereality of Stars

“Daily Life is harsh, most of us constantly seek an escape from it in fantasies and dreams. Stars feed on weakness; standing out from others  through a distinctive and appealing style, they make us want to watch them. At the same time, they are vague and ethereal, keeping their distance, and letting us imagine, more than is there. Their dreamlike quality works on our unconscious; we are not aware of how much we imitate them.”  

The Art of Seduction- Robert Greene 

I have been reading The Art of Seduction, by Robert Green. A book I would normally not read. I do not believe people should be “seduced”… A friend recommended the book to me a few years back and I was not interested… The art of seduction… is manipulation…

However, I finally began to read the book after he read it again. I was shocked by the value of some of the context. While the ultimate goal is obtaining “power”, the concepts and stories embedded within are beautiful metaphors of Life and People. I could go on…

I recommend this book with apprehension… I am not one for obtaining power, I feel that power is a root of destruction… coexisting takes much more effort.   

I feel as though maybe I should have worded this better. I do not want to give the impression that I am supporting manipulation and this book is far from… I wanted to show that looks and preconceived notions can be deceiving…