My dreams

I often speak to you as if you are my future, my life, my hopes, my truths… my escape… my reality.

Yet as of late, the nights have turned restless, fever rushes and sweat drowns my peace

As of late, the visions which fall bring not rest

As of late, the nights which gather make my eyes heavy with longing of nights which have passed

As of late, I sit in the corner and wait for dawn. Awake. Alone.


I have spoken to you so often, yet tonight I address you, directly, and ask of you to return to me.

Do not begrudge me my mistakes, for I may have taken for granted, but I have never forsaken my peace.

Please return to me

my future, my life, my hopes, my truths… my escape… my reality…

my dreams

I remember nights when I would smile and await the next adventure,

the reality of  life faded and  accompanied the shadows to rest.

The replaced image was one of silence and experience

This new uncertainty became truth… I remember the nights.

I remember the mornings when I would smile and try to capture every detail,

relive the fantasy, find that which I believed in, feel the freedom of all I owned… be that which knows no bounds… almost discovering the reflection in the mirror is all but a mirage… it is the real you

the fragrances of life, the tastes of air, the sights and sounds… all aware… all in there… it is the truth… I remember the mornings when my mind would comfort my soul

one day,

one day

your dreams shall

be real,

for all which is,

is all

In dreams

Gone

Would they realize I was gone? Vanishing, never to be heard from again.

Would they take my  leave as an invitation to search, to try to figure out… what happened?

Would they feel my absence? More than physical, more than emotional? Or lack there of…

Would they take my leave as prompted? Something led cause to this, yet they know not what…

Reassure them that I have left so many times, this is but the first time they noticed.

The countless hours spent within

My thoughts

An untold number of wishes

A myriad of dreams

All passed on, by the ones who now take notice

I will return. Time moves strange where we are. The absence noticed by the others, is simply a flicker of recognition

This makes me smile, for they know not where we are.

The others see and mirror the other facets of where we are.

The many sides of the cut gem

Our mind…

Would they realize I was gone? Only if they realized they were too.

Alone with time… alone in my mind

My dearest friend, my guardian, my watcher… what plagues you? For one whose presence was known, now your voice is quiet. For one whose brilliance once shone, now your light is faint. All things in time. Time is the blessing, the blessing for which the latter seems the same. The blessing of suffering and pain, yet one which experienced is indeed the same.

Time, enabler of silence. The means to an end… For which have you say my friend… is it within or without. What say you to my voice, the very voice which has been silenced? What say you to the light, for it was once ours to see in the darkest of nights… What thoughts have you to my query? The very thoughts I leave presented on the ground. My letter, my voice, my sound…

What say you to these things… shall I leave you be. Leave you with time? Shall I lay on the blanket of clouds and listen to the angels singings from above… Shall I wait for you? or is it Time… For you seem to have lost the battle… and become a prisoner to the mind…

 

 

Captivated and confused, we must lose the illusion of Time…. for what is it, truly?

Wisdom of Ages

Solar_Eclipse_comp_3b_crop1

The time came 

Once

In an era of darkness

When the light radiated from within its people

Shined from within their hearts

Lost in darkness yet unafraid

 

For there lay magic within the minds

Powers within their hearts

And knowledge within their Souls

 

The time has come once

Again

In an era of light

This time the light outshines the people

The light blinds their hearts

Impairs their minds 

Shadows their Soul

Surrounded by a light of falsehood

The people are unaware to the Soul’s fear

For the people have forgotten the magic

Hushed the voice of the mind

Instead turned to the voice of the machine

The machine which radiates the light we made

 

 

I sit here and ponder how lost we can become… life running around us at speeds too fast to comprehend. The oneness, the whole of the world… integrated with time

Yet distancing us from the times we left behind

Our memories

Even before our lifetime we were blessed to have the wisdom of the ages. Blessed and yet too busy to look for the meanings, too busy for once we had them and let them fall silent. Silent as a language not practiced and silenced for lack of confidence. Yet we fear not for we have them recorded. Today they are translated  in our modern world. Categorized, defined and compartmentalizes into easy convenient  truths  easily digested as myth, reality or fact… 

The fact is

We lost the magic, the gift, the wonder of not understanding and accepting… we even define God… The ancients knew God… Through fear and awe… Through nature and the Heavens… Through the body and the mind… through the Soul

I sit here and ponder…

*

The Seer who lost sight

*

The witch bound by her own witchery

*

The wizard with lost wisdom

*

A prophet to prophesies the past

 

Yet  the time came once

In an era of darkness

When the people were not afraid

Perhaps the false light shall fail

Will you be able to see?

Infinite

Life is a road, our futures foretold

In a mirror we peak, our destiny we seek

What we call our journey is perhaps an adventure

Life is the vision, forever an endeavor

The distance seems long, at times the timing seems wrong

For our life is written on pages not given

In the book only He reads
In the library only He seeds

For God grants us life
For God grants us strife

We make it and take it
We break and forsake it

We sow it
We grow it

If only we know it

What have you but a Journey?
What have you but one life?

What say you today?

The one who says this is all?

What say you today?

The one who claims to know the meaning of the fall?

Our Journeys will unfold
Our lives will come to One

And in that time
We shall see

And in that time

All shall be

We live but one Life…
That one life universal
That one Life is but one…

What is one?

One is alone

One if Infinite

Distant Love Within

How did you find me here?
I was alone in my mind
How far did you look?
Was there distance in this time?

It is so hard to send you away

I have hid from you
I have known you as the one
I know it is meant to be
I live in time,
Yet I am not free

Perhaps one day we will find the words we must say

My heart breaks for you
My soul aches for you
I have bled rain for you
I have swallowed pain for you

You must see, this is the way it shall be

You must leave this place
For the time here is wrong
You must forget my face
It won’t be long, you must be strong

You must leave… until we meet, I shall silently grieve

It seems unkind
The roads of Life unwind, intertwine
With each dream we seek blindly
The morning dawns and rains tears

The sun rises… puts to ease our dreaming fears…

Then passes years, silently waiting in shadow… listening to the minds reason

listening and waiting

Our time is not now

One life it will be

Together if ever

Will it be?
Will it be? 

Our time is not now
One life it will be
Together if ever
Will it be?
Will it be

Ready to leave this place? 

Ready to remember my face?

I am…

Uriel

It fell in the ancient periods 
  Which the brooding soul surveys, 
Or ever the wild Time coin’d itself 
  Into calendar months and days.

This was the lapse of Uriel, 
Which in Paradise befell. 
Once, among the Pleiads walking, 
Sayd overheard the young gods talking; 
And the treason, too long pent, 
To his ears was evident. 
The young deities discuss’d 
Laws of form, and metre just, 
Orb, quintessence, and sunbeams, 
What subsisteth, and what seems. 
One, with low tones that decide, 
And doubt and reverend use defied, 
With a look that solved the sphere, 
And stirr’d the devils everywhere, 
Gave his sentiment divine 
Against the being of a line.
“Line in nature is not found; 
Unit and universe are round; In vain produced, all rays return; 
Evil will bless, and ice will burn.” 
As Uriel spoke with piercing eye, 

A shudder ran around the sky; 

The stern old war-gods shook their heads; 
The seraphs frown’d from myrtle-beds; 
Seem’d to the holy festival 
The rash word boded ill to all; 
The balance-beam of Fate was bent; 
The bounds of good and ill were rent; 
Strong Hades could not keep his own, 
But all slid to confusion.

A sad self-knowledge withering fell 
On the beauty of Uriel; 
In heaven once eminent, the god 
Withdrew that hour into his cloud; 
Whether 
doom’d to long gyration
In the sea of generation

Or by knowledge grown too bright 
To hit the nerve of feebler sight. 
Straightway a forgetting wind 
Stole over the celestial kind, 
And their lips the secret kept, 
If in ashes the fire-seed slept. 
But, now and then, truth-speaking things 
Shamed the angels’ veiling wings; 
And, shrilling from the solar course, 
Or from fruit of chemic force, 
Procession of a soul in matter,
Or the speeding change of water, 
Or out of the good of evil born, 
Came Uriel’s voice of cherub scorn, 
And a blush tinged the upper sky, 
And the gods shook, they knew not why. 

Ralph Waldo Emerson

1846


A poem for my friend…

my angelarchangel_uriel