Category Archives: Journeys

For My Father

Posted by enreal on

I sit here and wait… wait for the day. Thursday December 18th will be two years… Two years my since my father passed on… went home. The first year was the hardest I find… as time passed I learned to look at life and death differently. My views have changed, in part of his death and in part of what I see after his passing…

On Sunday I went to the cemetery… our family gathered for a memorial. During this time there was a prayer said… as I looked around all heads were bowed… jackets pulled tight, guarding … protecting from the cold… gazes sorrowful, melancholy heavy in the air…  the air carried bitter cold and sadness… and then,  then it happened… what I have been praying for… my sign… and I do believe it was… I felt warmth and my thoughts turned to him…  for a moment the seemingly overcast winter sky opened up… the sun shone brightly… I felt warm… I felt light… I looked around to see if anyone else felt the same… but alas… they missed my joy… one day they shall know what I know… believe what I believe… one day…


So today I say live and be thankful… live in the memories of those who passed… live with the knowledge of the memories we form today, with our loved ones… live with them and take thanks and know you are blessed with each and every moment… live with the feelings of wonder and uncertainty… for the uncertainty is life… so live with life… 

I shall always miss my father… I shall shed many more tears when milestones arrive, when I need his guidance… when I miss his presence… I shall weep for his passing, yet from now on they are my selfish tears… for I know now that he is here and he is always watching… I feel his love in me… the same love he shared with us… I shall share… 


My father loved me and my sisters… my nephew… and he would have loved my newest nephew… And we loved him. Life was hard for him and through it all he had always the greatest appreciation for it. I wish I had half the strength to live as he did, I wish I had half of the passion he had, I wish I had more time…

Dedication to my father

I know life had been hard on you
If I could have had just one wish
I would have carried your burden

Now I could only wish…
I could see your face again
Look upon your sad eyes

See your empty gaze
Hold your cold hands

Things haven’t been the same
When you left, you took the part of my soul that belonged to you

It took too long for me to understand
What we all belong to is something else

We belong to Life
Not the other way around.

Until we meet again…I love you daddy

 

The Man and His Sun

Oedipus From Time To Time

21 Days in Paradise/~ Day 20

21 Days in Paradise

 

These I wrote in dedication to my father

For Love of Father

A year

Unconditional Love

With you

Posted by enreal on

guardian

 

My dearest, why are you sad?

Why do you weep?

What brings forth the pure water from the center of your being?

What brings down the saline of your Soul


Speak to me

Truthfully

For I know your heart

I know your mind

Yet I know not the Soul

In which you hide


I can here all which is spoken

In the mind, in the heart

I know all which is intended

I feel all which is felt

Yet I  know not of matters of the Soul

Your Soul belongs to You


For you see as I see

I feel as you feel

I am with you

I can guide you

We can plant the seeds of your heart

Use your tears to grow 

With your wisdom we sow

A garden for both to know


So once again tell me my dearest, why are you sad?

Why do you weep?


You know I am here

Yet you run

You needn’t run

Fall to your knees

Kneel before your life

Let me be

With you

At peace

Don’t be sad

 

End of the trail

Posted by enreal on

End of the Trail

The final steps taken

Shadows fall in line

The Pain

The shame

The Curse

The Blame

 

The end is near

We slow

We fear

Our head hung in vision

A knowing 

The decision

Life 

Death

The end of the trail…

Peace

 

 

 

The end of the trail is a sculpture by James Earle Fraser. I recently became haunted by this image… Holding so much pain and rapture in a sculpture… yet there is hope and reason for it… A beautiful piece. 

A light in a dark place

Posted by enreal on

As of late I have been in a dark place. I find my mind and soul are fighting… the ego is putting me in this game once more… It is taking its toll… I am tired. I know some have voiced there concerns… I am sorry. It has crept into my writing. It has seeped into my work.


I always try to write about emotions and pain… with a hope and dream involved… the light in a dark place… I try to give hope because somewhere inside I have hope. Yet my hope is tired and needs a rest… its burdens have taken a toll… so here I am in a dark place waiting for my light. And it shall come… I think I see a faint glow… so for those on their journey. I am on mine…I must wait and see what evolves… I shall see the light. I shall be lighter. For now… I apologize for my work… 

It is my journey


Sincerely yours,

Enreal

A myth

Posted by enreal on

The Origin of Light

 

Native American Lore

 

In the early times, there was only darkness; there was no light at all. At the edge of the sea a woman lived with her father. One time she went out to get some water. As she was scraping the snow, she saw a feather floating toward her. She opened her mouth and the feather floated in and she swallowed it. From that time she was pregnant.

Then she had a baby. It’s mouth was a raven’s bill. The woman tried hard to find toys for her child. In her father’s house was hanging a bladder that was blown up. This belonged to the woman’s father. Now the baby, whose name was tulugaak (Raven), pointed at it and cried for it. The woman did not wish to give it to him but he cried and cried. At last she gave in and took the bladder down from the wall and let the baby play with it. But in playing with it, he broke it. Immediately, it began to get light. Now there was light in the world, and darkness, too.

When the woman’s father came home, he scolded his daughter for taking the bladder down from the wall and giving it to the child. And when it was light, tulugaak had disappeared.

an Alaskan Myth from the Inuit

 

There is always some truth behind myths, some knowledge which one receives from the heavens to share for eternity… a tale to live forever in our minds… to grow in thought and escape into freedom… Words to inspire great vision… a great vision we can journey towards… it is in these visions, these myths… these tales which inspire us to bring forth salvation and great possibilities…


Let us create through thought… let us live through visions… let us believe in myths and fairy tales… We were given our minds… our hearts… the capacity for such greatness…Let us believe in something…

Silent Night

Posted by enreal on

The sky is ever so fair

Stars glisten, blissfully unaware

The ray of orange surpassing their might

As rays of sun blind us from eternal a night

 

The wind nestles the trees

Promising release and reprieve

The onus unfair

Leaving promises forever to bear

 

Ponder these tasks upon these silent nights

Watch the light dance upon the moon sunlight

Reflect as reflections do

Shimmer and dance into something new

Yet when reflections fade

Remember it and gaze into darkenss

Sit in silence

For these are the silent nights

 

When the night is nearly spent

We watch and wait

For the dawn is the new fate

And dawn shall bring a new day

And day shall bring a new night

A silent night

We shall wait

The journey

Posted by enreal on

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I have come a long way
Journeyed a quiet pass
Explored a closed passage
Fallen away to the past

I have learned of virtue
I have learned of pain
I have learned to be patient
even learned to tempt fate…

All my wandering
All my travels rest
I am left in solace
I am quietly blessed

For time is wisdom
Wisdom is gained
The road to discovery
Forever I paved

 

Though simple it seems

We often learn more from our dreams

To follow the everyday path

To remember the meanings have passed

To look for the journey

We must look for the pain

To look for happiness

We must be able to envision the same