Category Archives: Spirituality

Conversation with Soul

Posted by enreal on

… I was just thinking… throwing around your ideas… playing with your different emotions, attempting to understand them better…

Understand emotions better? How can that possibly be? Do you not feel them, do you not cry when I cry? Laugh when I laugh? I think we speak in different tongues…

… I would assume the correct term would be alien… I am Soul… I am connected with and without… I am Soul… I feel, yet not in the way you do… I feel in the form of energy, not negative not positive… simply energy… the more powerful an emotion… the more driven I am to feel… emotions are my food… I crave… you could not understand… not now at least…
Is the paradox here language? Do we not mean what we mean… You speak, I understand, yet the context is not there… not in the same sense… I see the sun, yet to you it is a doorway to Life… I see the sky, yet to you it is a painting from God…

… Indeed… you see, you are my instrument… you are my charge… you are the only thing in this reality that makes me connect… you teach me with no lessons… you show me with your eyes… I listen with you and am by your side… ever translating you are no interpreter… I must learn… with each life… I must learn…

You speak of each life… when I die… do we not go together? You Soul… are we not one?

… My Enreal… we are, yet I know not how to show you… simply try to find, that place inside… all is inside…
… All will be revealed… when I learn… it is embedded… we are one… I am your Soul alone… yet I can connect with others…
… You see, ultimately… that is our purpose… learn and share… be at peace… we are all one, yet individual by the same right… we are all connected, yet separated by design…

I understand that I am and I understand that you are… there are no words to describe what we are or how Life truly works… am I correct? Shall I understand that this is beyond me… these words and meanings I am searching for are written in a book I can not read… are spoken with a voice I can not hear… or simply is it time… I have not reached that time yet? It is too soon…

… It is too soon, as I said all will be revealed… I can not find the words… I am waiting for your emotions… one day you will feel and I will speak…

Energies and your chaos theory

Posted by enreal on

Quite interesting discussion I had, partly with Grace, then on my own rant… individual energies and collective energies. Each ruled over by some force other than our own… I began thinking of purpose and destiny, as I do so often, and dived into my Life, the random acts that followed a flap of a butterflies wings…

Grace:”I have to pose the question to ‘all of us’. And that is this: Isn’t ALL of life a series of energy exchanges?… Each and everyone of our actions is some sort of energy exchange. INTENTION behind the exchange is really at the heart of the matter, isn’t it? Enreal: “…it is all about energy exchanges… not just individual exchanges, but as a collective whole as well… that seems to be where people mostly lose their energies, as if it is too big a challenge… that is where they are wrong, it only takes a butterflies wings to cause a devastating storm…“

How are these two related? Everything is related… an endless cycle… energy behind chaos behind purpose behind life…

What was your catalyst, the energy behind your life, where you are right now… so then is chaos your destiny?

My chaos theory in brief:

Father and Mother meet under difficult circumstances
I was born and 6 months later was hospitalized for 12 months for tuberculosis. I almost died( no enreal ) =( My father always used to say, “there is a reason you lived, there is a purpose, it was a miracle”

4 years later and 2 countries later we immigrated to the US as political refugees from Romania.

Parents divorced and the rest is simply growing up and discovering myself…

Driving one day enreal came to me…

My father passed away and enreal supported me…

My chaos theory and Enreal

the butterfly flapped its wings in the form of a breath a decision a time a place… and that is as far back as I can tell… but I guess it goes back to before all time… the first spark the first light… who can truly ever understand chaos? I just got a bit confused myself… what is your chaos theory? I believe it began at the same moment as mine…

Strangely Beautiful Morning

Posted by enreal on

A strangely beautiful morning…

I wake to a bright grey scene, my window over looks a lake, today it is unsettled. Something is new, something has awoken. The day is blustery, yet mild. There are snowflakes dancing on the wind and clouds are playing with sun. This strangely beautiful morning I enter the world. I walk and look to the sky an eerie silence is muted by the wind and trees that dance, they rustle for recognition as they enter the world on this strangely beautiful morning.

A change is in the air, an era struggles to fall and a season struggle to wake… One from an active awe and one from an awesome state. On this strangely beautiful morning a tear has fallen from the sky… one which grazes my lash and embraces my skin… I welcome the tear and yearn for my own… I welcome the tear and call to my soul.

I call for release, the tear, and what is represents. I call for an answer on this strangely beautiful morning…

I realize that my call has been heard, if not from all, then from the trees and wind. I can accept that, on this strangely beautiful morning.

Misunderstood

Posted by enreal on

I am the one you wont behold
I hold something you can not mold
I have peace forever old
I have centuries of secrets which wont be told

I am your peace
I am your solace
I am your undefinable
I am your abstract

I give you comfort
I am your friend
I am your father
Until the end

Some call me Soul
Some call me Old
Some call me God
Yet some never call

A captive of Life
Confined in you
Forever with you
Unassumingly misunderstood

I have died before

Posted by enreal on

I have died before this night
This time
This place

I have died before in peace
With solace
With grace

I have died before and learned
Found my lesson
For the return

I remember it clear
I have died before
There was no fear

Yet with remembrance comes confusion
All for knowledge
Lack retribution

For I have died
Yet, I also lived

For which is gravity and light
For which is greater
Death or Life

I had a dream, a vivid dream, one which confused me, yet, left me at peace. Let me begin by stating that my dreams always involve some great adventure…Each night another great Quest…( I love to dream ) So analyze this one…

My sister and I were driving, it was dark. We had had some difficulties with my car earlier in the dream. Nonetheless, we were driving. Then we come to a precipice. A jagged line of rocky cliffs, bordering a road with no signs. My sister, who is diving my car, almost drives off…but at the next turn does…

AS we are falling down the seemingly short fall…I was battered by an explosion of energies and feelings, my heart was racing, yet the fear was quick to dissolve…My sister reaches out touches my face and says calmly and sadly, “I am sorry I killed you” In my final moment I felt a pang of sadness so profound…

I died. I did not wake. I felt my mind. I felt my mind being silenced. There was a separation, I felt my mind being separated from me. I felt a nothingness so strong, yet it was the most beautiful feeling. Nothing. A calm, dark yet bright place of silence filled with beautiful music. I felt at peace. I felt content…

I always had a beautiful vision of death…one which, when my time comes I will embrace…I never imagined I could be content with nothing, yet I understand…

This dream was a reminder, whether illusion or reality…challenge your beliefs, remember the possibilities

Conversation with Subconsciousness

Posted by enreal on

…then I am who I am…you are who you are…what are we…

I have been trying to reach you…I made it through!

…Who are you…who am I…

Can you hear me? Am I getting through? Why is it so veiled? Is this a mirage?

…Who are you…who am I…

Are you my self…are you my desires…can you tell me who I am, what I want?

…

Be still, be silent and listen…I reached my deepest level…my hidden self…my subconscious…that is who you are…

…I think there for I am…that is who I am…I am you?

Yes

…So why then this joy? why have you been trying to reach me? If I am you?

There are certain things I do not understand, certain dreams, desires I can not comprehend, I was hoping for some resolve on emotions, can you enlighten me?

…I see, you search for meaning. Answers you believe to be inside…I think there for I am…I understand all that is shown to me…I take in all I see and make emotions clear…I can not enlighten you…

But you are my subconscious…do you not understand my desires, our desires?

…I see through a portal…I glimpse something more than your life…I get a partial view of a larger picture…a beautiful other world…

I am lost

…No, you are not, one day you will see…and on that day…we’ll be free…

…for now, heed your advice. Be still, be silent and listen…there are some things you need not understand…they are for me, your mind and soul…

I do not understand, this is chaos…

…chaos…is…then…then I am who I am…you are who you are…what are we…

We are one

God’s Boxes

Posted by enreal on

I would like to thank Bill for this…a very simple reminder for us all

God’s Boxes

I have in my hands two boxes,
Which God gave me to hold.
He said, “Put all your sorrows in the black box,
And all your joys in the gold .”

I heeded His words, and in the two boxes,
Both my joys and sorrows I stored,
But though the gold became heavier each day,
The black was as light as before.

With curiosity, I opened the black,
I wanted to find out why,
And I saw, in the base of the box, a hole,
Which my sorrows had fallen out by.

I showed the hole to God, and mused,
“I wonder where my sorrows could be!”
He smiled a gentle smile and said,
“My child, they’re all here with me..”

I asked God, why He gave me the boxes,
Why the gold and the black with the hole?
“My child, the gold is for you to count your blessings,
The black is for you to let go.”

We should consider all of our friends a blessing
Send this to a friend today just to let them know you
are thinking of them and that they are a joy in your life.

A ball is a circle, no beginning, no end.
It keeps us together like our Circle of Friends.
But the treasure inside for you to see,
Is the treasure of friendship you’ve granted to me.

Today I pass the friendship ball to you.
Pass it on to someone who is a friend to you…