Perhaps she failed you, perhaps you failed me…

Perhaps I placed all my hopes in the most fragile of jars… watching, waiting as they teetered on the edge of the shelves in my mind

Perhaps I placed all my desires upon the wild flames only to have them cooled by the beautifully soft winds. Lightly and ever so gently she reduced them to embers and ashes which she carried delicately in her invisible arms

Perhaps all my dreams have vanished to another realm, another world, another place where they can dance and laugh and be free… for they do dance, laugh and are free somewhere… I can remember this for a second as my eyes smile to the morning light then slowly give passage to the reality of the day. The seeming finality of what is real… but what happens to that second, that glimpse… why must it be erased so quickly… when all I want to do is be there… why must it pass?

Why must she take them to her hidden reality.

She made you be present, disenchanted, aware.

If indeed you are, then I have failed too. For to break such hopes, to extinguish such desires, to forget such dreams… is sad.

To do these things is sad. It weighs heavy on my heart. I pray you understand.

She failed me too.

Yet I know not if you understand. To hear of your disappointment brings the fire to my heart… it is one of shame and disillusion. I dreamed you always by my side, guiding me, and now I want to hide as a child who is afraid of her shadow.

Why now? Why must I see this failure now? It is a failure to see reality and turn away, so for now I  shall wait with my shadows and ask of you, my victor… is it too late?

Why must I save you from her, if she is me and I am you?