The reason

Everything changes into the same.

People and places forgetting their names.

Once upon a time, there was a reason

Now it is a season

Of my Life.

 

There is a reason why I am writing, though it eludes me now. I want to express something, though I can’t name it. I can’t see it. I can’t touch it. I can only feel it… they say to feel your words. I do. Yet I can not write.

 

It isn’t writing block. I can write. I just don’t want to. I used to dream that my words mattered… I would write for people… those who wanted to read… even if was just me. Throw my words into the horizon and let them be found… like a guiding star… I would write because I thought that someone needed to hear my thoughts… I would write because I thought that one day someone might need them… yet now… I don’t even want them…

 

I do yet I don’t… I don’t because I failed them… as I failed myself… I need my words, yet I turn away… again and again and again.

 

There is a reason why I am writing… it is because I need to. I will write again… I need to be patient and focus on why

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9 responses to “The reason

  1. maybe with all your happiness….for now…you are fulfilled and content…but a writer that writes as beautifully as you will return when you are ready….just enjoy your happiness and holidays for now….hope you have a wonderful holiday

  2. ..I failed myself… I need my words, yet I turn away… again and again and again.
    Again, words that seem written for me, although I know they were not. I struggle with this, again and again. I begin to wonder if I have failed myself, or will always have an ebb and tide of writing.

    Now it is a season

    Of my Life.

    I don’t know why this is so, but your words above have been my exact words many, many times lately. I say it with sadness, joy, understanding, bewilderment, and everything in between. But it’s what I know.
    To every thing there is a season, and a time to every purpose under the heaven.

    I’m having wordpress issues when commenting, so apologies if this is disjointed…posting in trust that this is readable.

    Peace to you and Happy New Year-
    Pearl

    • There are reasons we hear or see or read somethings that make sense to us at a particular moment… A certain Synchronicity if you will. Be it coincidence or serendipitous… I believe it is meant to be… It is there to remind you not to give up, do not feel disheartened… it tis a season. Look inside and feel it, even if it hurts… One day you will feel the answer and see, for now I am blessed to be here for you… blessed to have you here for me… Blessings my friend

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